Passing Clouds

#14 Lil

Why did I set myself up to want to compensate her? Tap the title to read our story…

“Will you be going to Ridley’s tonight?” Ricky asked.

“Unusual, you had been partying quite a lot recently.” I commented. “And for you, Ridley’s it will be tonight.”

We reached Ridley’s slightly after 9 pm. Despite being there almost every night, I still prefer to be at the hunting ground early. As the saying goes, “The early cock bird gets the pussy worm.” And it did indeed held true for me most of the time.

Shortly after we reached, I spotted one. After a short observation, when I was about to make my approach, Ricky suddenly held onto my arms, “Bro, I have a confession to make.”

“What? It’s Sunday already?” I chuckled, but maintained visuals on my target.

“Bro, please. I need to tell you now.” Ricky said.

“Alright. I’m all ears.” I diverted my attention to Ricky.

“I saw a girl here two weeks ago. I wanted to befriend her but I don’t know how. Even if I do, I was afraid that she might reject me.” Ricky started.

“Since that night, I kept thinking about her. That’s why I came here almost every night, hoping that I could see her here again.”

“And she’s here tonight.” He concluded.

That’s unbelievable! I thought.

In my opinion, Ricky was a hunk of a man. If I had half his looks and build, I would not need to employ so much of my brains to work on the girls. But hey, there’s always balance in everything.

Alright, since you trust me, I’ll help you. Said my inner voice.

“Where is she now?” I asked.

“She’s seated over there with her friends.” Ricky pointed to the direction of the bar counter.

I took a quick glance towards where he pointed. “There are quite a few girls there, which one?” I asked.

“The one with the white top.” Ricky answered.

“So, you need me to chat her up first right?” I asked.

Ricky did not answer, his eyes were staring on the floor, seemingly in his own thoughts. I was not sure why, but I found him pitiful.

“Tell you what, we go there and you point to me exactly which one.” I said.

Ricky hesitated for a moment before he finally took the first step.

Making use of the time while we moved, I did a quick sizing up on the different groups seated near the bar counter. Ok, generally friendly and approachable people.

“Which one?” I asked once Ricky halted his steps.

“Directly behind you.” Ricky whispered.

I turned around. The girl was back facing me. I pointed down my right index finger above her head and looked at Ricky for a double confirmation, to which he nodded his head nervously. For a brief moment, I thought I was looking at a life-sized bobblehead.

Making a 180 degrees turn to face Ricky’s dream girl, I landed my same index finger onto her right shoulder giving two gentle taps. I liked the view when she turned her head. Her shoulder-length hair followed in a smooth swinging motion. Seeing her face for the first time, I must admit that she looked appealing to me. You have good taste, Ricky. Said my mind.

“Yes?” She said, while slowly breaking into a smile when our eyes met.

“Has anyone told you that you have a charming smile?” I said.

“Huh?” She responded.

Damned! Almost forgot what I was here for.

“Yes, my colleague would like to get to know you. You ok with that?” I asked.

Before she could answer, I bent forward and whispered into her ear, “He is a very good-looking guy.”

“Really? Better than you?” She whispered back.

“” I employed a husky tone, trying to sound mysterious and with a pinch of humor.

“O..k…” She said, in similar imitation.

We both burst into a hearty laugh.

“Oh, and your name is?” I asked.


“Hi Lil, this is Ric…” I turned around but Ricky was nowhere in sight.

Damned! Not again! That was not the first time he chickened out while I was about to make introduction.


Backstory…The other time was in a place called Wet N Wild. And nope. It was not a sleazy place, just in case you had that thought. Wet N Wild was a water-theme park. What were you thinking about?

Ok, we continue…


“Ha! He must have gone to the toilet. Give me a moment. I’ll be back soon.” I said.

“Sure.” Lil smiled.

When I found Ricky, I was not particularly angry, but I just found him sort of a loser.

Pitiful soul. I thought.

But I kept my cool. Ricky finally followed behind me after my assurance that Lil was open to befriend him.

Along with introducing Ricky to Lil, I introduced ourselves to Lil’s group of friends. I brought the whole group over to our usual space that provided comfortable sofa seats as compared to the tall stools they were seating on.

Seeing that Ricky was more relaxed and chatting with Lil, I resumed from where I had left off but my target was nowhere to be found.

Alright. No prob. Catch her another time. I told myself. I’ll just go back to Mae’s place tonight.


Since knowing Lil, Ricky stopped following me to disco. Not that I had not expected it, but still, I felt a little disappointed.

One fine noon, while I was in the middle of reading a book by an author name Dr. Haha Lung, Ricky came seating beside, “Bro, I want to update you about me and Lil.”

Damned! My mind cursed. One for the disturbance of my peace. Two, I did not ask for an update. And last, his words “…me and Lil.” irked me. Grammatically incorrect and unconsciously self-centered.

Ricky thanked me for helping him and started talking about his courtship with Lil. They dated twice in that duration of two weeks. From Ricky’s description, I could picture them starting a relationship soon. Good, at least I had done something for my colleague. I felt happy for Ricky.


Few days after, while our team was clearing up furniture from a building in preparation to make it our new office, Ricky chanced upon an edition of Playboy Magazine.

“Wow, let me take a look.” I reached out my hand.

Ricky brought the magazine toward his chest and wrapped his other arm around it, “I found it, that’s mine.” From the look on his face, I could sense that he was serious about HIS possession.

“Just a fucking magazine, need to have such reactions?!” Said a disappointed me.

Since then, we only talked on work related stuff. Nothing else.

Sometime about two weeks later, I was drinking alone in Ridley’s, drowning my sorrows and sorting my thoughts on my relationship with Mae, I heard a female voice called out, “Alone? Can we join in?”

I looked up to see Lil and two other of her girl friends.

“Sure.” I said.

“You looked serious just now. Facing challenges at work?” Lil asked.

“I look like that when I am reading or deep in thoughts.”

“Ricky would be joining us later.” She informed.

“Oh…ok.” I said.

“You know? Ricky and I are not in a relationship.” She said.

“I know. I can tell.”

“Seriously? You can tell? How?” She said in amazement.

“By their presence.” I pointed to her two friends.

Lil let out a laugh. Seemingly impressed by my answer.

“You are so different from him.” She said.

Oh please…Don’t compare me with an inferior creature. Said my inner thoughts.

“Of course we are. Everyone is unique.” I smiled.

“I must admit that when I first met him, I was captivated by his good looks and muscular figure. But I do find him a bit…different. I could not quite figure what it was until just now.” She said.

I raised my eyebrows showing a “Huh? Tell me more.” look.

“We can’t really communicate. We sort of dated twice thus far, and I was the one who did most of the talking. He, on the other hand, was giving me blank stares most of the time. And when I asked him about his views or opinions, he would give answers that made no sense to me.” She continued.

Yup…That’s the Ricky I know.

“And I’m not sure if he was being frank or insensitive…by the way, he had an ex who was a Caucasian right?”

I nodded.

“He had been telling me things like how pretty she looked, how good her fashion sense was, and singing other praises. Can you picture that kind of situation I was in? I was not sure how to react or continue. Really awkward.” She said.

I nodded, with an emphatic smile.

“Speaks of the devil.” I said jokingly when my peripherals caught sight of a familiar figure.

They shifted to sit at the bar counter. Lil invited me to join them but I declined. I just wanted to drink alone.

In the duration of the few hours that night, she dropped by our usual space to chat with me a number of times. From our conversations, I could almost confirm that she was attracted to me. *Ok, I lied…I knew she already was.

I was already quite drunk by the end of the night. At the taxi stand, Lil held onto my hand and pulled me to board the cab with them. Again, I declined. I could not bring myself to share the same cab with Ricky. Lil had no choice but to leave with them.

I called Mae’s home wanting to inform her that I was making my way back to her place but her mother – who answered the phone – informed that Mae had gone out since 9 plus. Damned!

I paged Mae. She called back shortly to inform that she was drinking with her friends at Hard Rock Cafe. I understood the game she was playing. “Fine then.” I hung up on her.

A toxic mix of emotions welled in my narrow mind. While I took long drags from my ciggie, I looked around at the groups of patrons trickling out from Ridley’s, searching for an unlucky group to land my punches on.

Then, an idea lighted up in my mind, Let’s try killing two birds with one stone. I dialed Lil’s mobile.

“Hello?” Lil answered.

“It’s me.”

“I know.”

“I want you to alight the cab and come to me.”

“I can’t.”

“Oh…Ok then.” I said, slightly disappointed as I did not expect such an response.

The indicators were there. Did I miss something? I questioned myself.

“Wait! Let me finish my sentence!” She exclaimed.

“I’m listening.” I said.

“We are in the middle of PIE (Pan Island Expressway) now. I’ll alight once we are off the expressway, then I’ll take a cab back to you. Where are you now?” She continued.

“ANA Hotel, lobby.”

“Got it. See you later.” She said without missing a beat.

In my mind’s eye, I could foresee how the night was going to end, but I found myself not feeling excited about it.

Was it Mae affecting me, or was it just me?

I wasn’t long in my drowsy state when I felt a hand tapping gently onto my lap.

“You alright?” Lil asked.

“I must have dozed off.” I said.

“You drank a lot tonight. Is something bothering you?” She queried.

Alright, Act 1 Scene 1. Camera!

I nodded, along with an audible sigh.

“I just want to numb the pain here.” I padded my left chest.

“What happened?” She asked.

“Since that night we met, I took a liking to you. But I had a promise to keep. These past weeks had not been easy for me, especially tonight…” I began.

Lil listened quietly.

“I had to keep telling myself that loving someone is not about possession. I’m contented seeing you together with Ricky.” I continued.

We were both quiet for a moment.

Lil’s jovial tone broke the silence. “You! You had me fooled! All these while, I could not pick up any sign from you at all. How did you do that?”

Of course you can’t…there wasn’t any to give.

“Tell you a secret, it was love at first sight.” Lil said with a wide grin.

“Really?” I pretended to look surprised.

“Absolutely.” She said.

“You mean? You…” I purposely stopped short.

Lil nodded.

I held onto her hand that was still on my lap, and pulled her towards me. She shifted herself to sit onto my laps where we hugged and kissed.

We checked into ANA Hotel.

In the room, I was sitting at the edge of the bed, thinking about Mae when Lil exited the shower room wrapped only with a towel. The piece of white fabric barely covered the full length of her torso. For every step she took, the lower edge of the towel would move up and down slightly, revealing her vulva in a ‘now you see me, now you don’t’ manner. The eye-candy served as a good distraction, Mae got pushed out of my mind almost immediately.

Lil halted when she was about a foot in front of me. She placed both her hands on my shoulders and leaned forward to land a peck on my forehead. Our eyes met when I raised my head. Lil gave me a smile. I felt her love in that smile and from the glitter in her eyes. It felt so nice that it pricked my heart. I closed my welled up eyes. No, not now. I told my self-conscious.

I placed my hands on the sides her hip to bring her a step closer to me and wrapped my arms around her slim waist, giving her a tight hug and at the same time, leaned my head onto her chests.

Sorry to pull you into this, Lil. I will compensate you. I made up my mind to treat Lil well for as long as we are together.

With that decision, I loosened the towel and let it drop onto the floor, revealing Lil’s true self. The first thing that caught my attention was her pubic hair which was trimmed into the shape of a heart.

“Wow. Nice.” I ran my fingers lightly over the turf. Lil responded with a shy smile.

She lowered her head and our lips touched. We engaged in a round of long passionate kiss.

I stood up and moved ourselves to switch positions. With her back towards the bed, I gently her body gently down. Spreading her legs apart, I feasted my eyes on her pubes. Her pink vagina was already lubricated by a thin, clear layer of fluid.

As I lowered myself for the insertion, Lil lifted her legs and wrapped them around my waist. It was a smooth entry. The tightness was just nice for my liking. I moderated the speed of the thrusts as I wanted to prolong the session to give Lil the enjoyment.

Sometimes, things just happened with a twist. I did managed to delay ejaculation for a number of times. But when I deemed that I had given Lil enough, I was unable to achieve a shot. I was dripping perspiration and Lil was drying up. We stopped twice for me to catch my breaths. And when I finally did manage to release onto her, it was already near dawn.

For the following three weeks plus or so, Lil was always by my side whenever we went disco. I stayed faithful to her by not adding a Number 5 and not contacting Mae.

10 Mar 1997

I remembered that Monday night. I braced myself mentally when I saw Jack – one of Ridley’s bouncers – pushing past the patrons in urgency to get into our usual space.

“Your girlfriend is on her way coming up here.” Jack whispered into my ears.

My body jolted straight. “Which one?” I asked, hoping it would not be Moon.

“The tall one.” Jack answered.

Mae. My mind concluded. I let out the breath that I was unknowingly holding.

“Should we stop her?” Jack offered.

“Thanks bro. No need. Let her pass.” I said.

Jack looked uneasy when he nodded and took his leave.

It was a funny view for me to witness my clique of friends froze for a split second when they saw Mae stepped into our usual space.

If Mae was surprised seeing Lil’s hand on my lap, she did not show it.

“Our friend?” Lil asked when she saw Mae.

I nodded.

Lil immediately stood up to introduce herself. After they shook hands, Lil mixed a glass of bourbon coke and offered it to Mae, which Mae accepted.

Good, Mae knows not to create a scene. Which could also means shes bearing hope to continue the relationship with me. But no. I need to make a closure with her soon. Maybe later tonight.

I did not speak with Mae and acted as though we were strangers. The rest of my friends, especially Ocean, tried their best to keep Mae entertained. Things seemed normal for an hour plus or so.

Part of my mind felt that things were not going to end well when Mae went to the toilet shortly after Lil.

I waited for about ten minutes before seeking one of the waitresses, Alice’s help to check the situation inside the Ladies.

Once out from the toilet, Alice’s expression confirmed that things did not bode well. But a part of my mind was still hopeful.

“Did they fight?” I asked.

“Nope. Both of them are crying.” Alice informed.

I thanked Alice.

“How you gonna settle this bro?” Ocean asked. The rest looked on with concerns.

“Simple, I’ll leave with whoever I came with tonight.” I said.

“But…” Ocean stopped short when he saw the two girls walking towards our space. “Deal with them first, we discuss later.” Ocean said to my ears.

My mind did a quick reasoning. Lil could have left immediately, instead, she walked back. Mae was few steps behind her. Not a total loss yet.

“Why must you do this to me?!” Lil asked.

I was sure I was not in love with Lil, but still, it pained my heart when I saw her cry. I extended my right hand to hold hers but she took a step back.

“Tell me, do you love me?” Lil asked.

You can speak the truth, end it tonight and set her free. Or tell a lie to buy an extension, but with the consequence of a greater blow to her when the next ending comes. Make a choice.

“I’m sorry Lil.” I said from the bottom of my heart.

Lil burst into tears. Shaking her head in disbelief.

Everybody in the space stood still, not knowing what to say or do as the rest of the patrons watched on.

Ocean suddenly shove me towards Mae. “You send Mae back. We will settle Lil.”

“No! I…”

“Bro! Listen to me.” Ocean cut me off.

“I assure you that we will send Lil to her doorsteps. Then I’ll call to let you know.” He continued. The rest of my clique nodded.

“Why not you all send Mae back. And don’t even need to inform me after that. Easier task.” I rebutted. Mae’s tears shot out upon hearing that.

Serves you right. Said my vindictive mind.

“Listen! This one only less than a month.” Ocean pointed at Lil.

“While Mae is already with you for a year plus. Frankly, we support her more.” He continued.

“You all don’t understand…” I tried to explain.

“We don’t want to understand! Just once, listen to us.” Mel interrupted. The rest nodded.

Fine then. That will be your Karma…I will deal with you slowly. I shot a look at Mae.

“Just once.” I repeated, with an evil smile.

Sorry we have to end this way. I wish you well. Said my heavy heart.

I took a final glance at Lil before turning to leave.


Lil, thank you for loving the undeserving me. -VV Cold

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